Hvorfor skal bøger være så lange. Netsite forsøger sig med superkorte versioner af klassik litteratur

I love books er nettets forum for ægte "short stories". Konceptet er enkelt: omskriv kendte romaner til maksimalt 25 ord. Det kan være en vanskelig øvelse, men kan også give nye kreative muligheder. Her er et lille udpluk:

Peter Høegs Frøken Smillas Fornemmelse For Sne bliver til:
Woman has "feeling" for snow. Boy dies. Woman goes to Island.

Samme forfatters Kvinden og aben bliver til:
Boy meets girls. Boy is ape. They elope.

Ringenes Herre bliver til:
Little guys go to a lot of trouble to get rid of stolen jewelry.

Biblen får disse ord med på vejen:
Good opening chapter. Main character arrives halfway through, but gets killed off early. Some de-cent (if dated) commandments. Cracking ending. Slighty too open to interpretation.

Og den nu genaktualiserede Fahrenheit 451:
Man burns books, reads one, changes mind

American Psycho:
Money-obsessed snob rapes and tortures hookers with hamsters and acid, writes reviews of Whitney Houston before revealing mental instability and unreliability of book's narrative.

Om J.D. Salingers ungdomsklassiker Catcher In The Rye:
He's a phoney.
She's a phoney too.
Play a song, stop showing off on the piano, phoney!
I wish I could catch the playing children.

Hemmingways Den gamle mand og havet kan genfortælles sådan:
There is an old man. Old man talks to himself. Catches fish. Talks to fish. Loses fish. Carries mast on his back. Falls asleep (or dies, whichever).

Bøger kan også læses forskelligt. Meget få har læst Ulysses af James Joyce. Her er tre varianter, hvis du skal klare dig i litterære kredse:

• Bloom walks, wanks, drinks, chats, fights, reads, ogles, and meets a mopey Stephen Dedalus on June sixteenth, nineteen oh four.
• walking around - nothing much to do - boring other people - why not leave out punctuation at the end, just for fun? It´s art, is it?
• Leopold Bloom wanders around Dublin, reminisces, frets about Molly's adultery, eats, tries to make a buck, masturbates. Crosses paths with Stephen Dedalus. Molly masturbates. Yes!